“It’s Like ... Skydiving”
EPISODE 226
Set Yourself Up for a Successful Study
In this episode, we're wrapping up our "Getting to Square One" Guided Study and giving you some real talk and practical tips on how to actually get started with a Square One study (or any gospel-focused conversation, really!). We're diving into questions like how to invite someone, how much to prep, and what to do if you get a tough question. Plus, don't forget to get your votes in for the Bible Bracket! Today's the LAST DAY to vote for your favorite Bible verses! Head over to biblegeeks.fm/bracket to make your voice heard. We're super excited about diving into the full Square One series soon, so this episode is all about getting you ready to lead the way. Thanks for tuning in!
Takeaways
The Big Idea: Focus and commitment in someone’s spiritual growth goes a long way in leading a successful gospel-centered conversation.
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Ryan: I'm not saying it's the same as jumping out of an airplane At some point you got to just go, you know, you just push off
Bryan: you're
really selling it for people Ryan It's like skydiving you know *
Introduction
Bryan: Well, hello everyone and welcome to the Bible Geeks Podcast. This is episode 226. I'm Bryan Schiele.
Ryan: I'm Ryan Joy. Yeah,
Bryan: And thanks so much everyone for tuning in on the heels of a, I would just say a very exciting Bible bracket draft that we did last episode. While everyone now is thinking about March Madness, and most importantly about their favorite Bible verses.
Today we're going to go back to the past or hear from the future. I don't know, some time travel reference.
Getting Back to Square One
Bryan: back to getting to Square One. It's quite a while that we were in getting to Square One, I think.
Ryan: we already got to Square One. Now we're getting there again.
Bryan: getting back to Square One apparently.
Ryan: back. That's actually a good way to put this. We're getting back to Square One. And as we get back into it, we want to make sure everybody's ready for what this is. And as we went through it, it was clear to see there's a few more things to share about
leading a study and what we want to do to pull all of these pieces
Bryan: I think when we put together.
that Getting to Square One series, that guided study that we did last season, we were covering disciple-making problems paradigms and then our practices. We tried to avoid, I think, a lot of the
But I think after we got done with everything, we started getting into sharing those checkpoint episodes of Square One last season, I started to feel like something was missing. ways to bridge the gap from just the information about how to lead a study, and then getting right into talking about Square One and some conversations you might have with somebody who doesn't know very much about the Gospels, like, what do we need to do to bridge the gap?
Practical Tips for Leading a Study
Bryan: So this is where I think we're going to be putting it all together and really talking a lot about some practical, maybe tips and tricks, not in a pejorative way, but hopefully in a helpful way.
Ryan: we
were trying to get away from tips and tricks, and now we're squarely planting ourselves in tips and tricks, like you say, and hopefully in a good way, but practical stuff, encourage people to get out there and share the gospel, and you know, I've taught classes on it, and there's just a lot of anxious questions sometimes if you're not used to sharing the gospel, You know, how do I invite someone to a study?
How do I prepare? How much should I prepare? What if they ask a hard question I don't know the answer to? And you know, on and on. So as we get ready to dive into 13 weeks of Square One, I mean, here pretty soon, we're going to be in it and in a stretch of Square One, so this is a chance to pause, give a little guidance to anyone leading a study, whether it's any kind of gospel-focused study, but then specifically some details on Square One.
Jesus Said: Mark 6:7-13
Bryan: speaking of a blast from the past, we used to spring Jesus-centric Bible verses on each other to start out our conversations. And so that's what we're going to do here on the episode to start things out, starting with something that Jesus said.
And Ryan, I have a verse for you. We've not coordinated this ahead of time, but surprise, it's Mark 6:7-13.
Ryan: Okay. Yeah,
Bryan: this is when Jesus calls the 12 and begins calling them out two by two it says there he gave them authority over the unclean spirits. He charged them to take nothing on their journey except a staff, no bread, no bag, no money in their belts, but to wear sandals and not put on two tunics.
And then here's kind of the focus of what Jesus says to them. He says, " Whenever you enter a house, stay there until you depart from there. And if any place will not receive you and they will not listen to you when you leave, shake off the dust that is on your feet as a testimony against them." And so then it says that they went out and proclaimed that people should repent.
So they're going out and doing the same kinds of work that we're really talking about doing here. So what do you get from this verse about when Jesus tells his disciples to go out in a very specific
Ryan: he's really eliminating a lot of complications. He says, you know, don't take any of this stuff with you. God's going to take care of you. You trust him. And then there's this simple focus on mission. You go in, you share these things with them, tell them what they need to hear, and they'll either receive it or they won't.
are two outcomes. They're gonna receive it, and if they do, awesome, that is what you came to bless them with. If they don't receive it, you move on. it's like the very dust from that city's ground is unholy and you're shaking it off and moving on. And there's this sense of
not getting stuck in their reaction.
You have more things to do. It's like Nehemiah said, I am doing a great work and I can't come down there to be with you, you know? And so there's the, yeah, so we have more things where we're going to say, okay, this is tragic, but we're going to go because there's someone else who needs this
Bryan: Yeah you used a word there in talking through that that I kind of honed in on as well. I focused on the idea of focus there, and that's kind of what you were talking about, helping them, you know, clarify or simplify, eliminating these complications.
It reminds me of Mr. Miyagi, you know, focus. And, you know, whenever you enter a house, he says there, "Stay there until you depart." And that's an interesting phrase that that I'd never really thought through before. Thinking through this verse, I usually go to the place like you were just talking about, shaking the dust off of your feet.
The Importance of Focus and Commitment
Bryan: But I've never really thought that much about his command to like, whenever you enter a house, stay there until you depart from there. And I think what Jesus is saying there is like, this is a big job that you have a lot of things that you need to be doing, you know, a lot of people you need to be talking to, but you need to anchor yourself in a place if they're receptive.
sit there, stay there, stay in that house. Don't go from house to house. Don't go bouncing around like a butterfly, you know. Just anchor and settle in. And I think anytime we have a big job, sometimes it can be easy to like try to spread ourselves super thin or try to focus on too many things. And I think what Jesus is helping them to do, not only clarifying by like telling them not to bring so many things and trust in him really, but also just, you know, stay put, be reliable, let people know where they can find you, you know, settle in and make sure that you're not overly anxious about all of these other things.
Like just be there and focus on the work that you need to do and be persistent in it, I
Ryan: that is an interesting detail that I've never thought about that either. Just stay in that spot. And I love the phrase. I say that all the time to myself as much as to anybody to settle in,
don't get scattered.
And that Mr. Miyagi quote is good. Focus. You know, there's also that sense of, of commitment here. That brings me to my favorite Mr. Miyagi quote, you have to decide, right? Are you going to go and work here? Are you going to move on? You need to leave everything behind and just focus in, you know, karate.
Yes. Okay. Karate. No. Okay. Karate middle of road, squash like grape.
Bryan: Yep.
Ryan: Karate
Bryan: so good for sure
Ryan: maybe. so never works. You got to be on one side or the other of the road. And so, and which is also what we're going to be asking people do in our studies is to make a decision. There is no middle ground, and so we're going to try to clarify that.
Yes or no, you have to make a commitment one way or another about Jesus.
Seven Questions to Prepare for a Study
Bryan: yeah, and so let's get into revisiting getting to Square One a little bit and sort of put everything together here in a couple questions, actually seven questions that we're gonna be answering. Some things that we think are important in setting up a study, getting ready for a study,
Question #1: How Do You Prepare?
Bryan: So the first, topic of conversation is how do you prepare yourself for a discussion? You know, how do you get everything ready? What are you focused on, internal, external, like all the things you could be doing. I'm pretty sure I know your first answer for this one. So what do you recommend people do to prepare themselves to study with someone?
Ryan: Are you thinking of prayer as my
first
Bryan: thinking of prayer. [laughs] It's great. Oh yes.
Ryan: that's a pretty good place to start. That is a really, really important piece of this. And great athletes and other just skilled professionals in all different areas talk about being in flow state where you're free, you're focused, you're at peak performance.
And when you're wrecked by nerves about something, it's hard to imagine even getting to a place like that. That prayer and inner preparation, you know, really, you talked about settling in, about focusing, preparing yourself to really
be oriented to the goals, to the things you want to accomplish, the things God wants to accomplish in this conversation or this study you're going to enter in can help you, I think, get at least closer to letting go of all the details and the perfectionism and really focus on the task at hand.
I don't know how to overstate the value, at least for me and my experience of preparing my heart and spending some real time and effort praying, praying for most importantly, the person you're going to be studying with.
And I do this, if I'm gonna preach a lesson or teach a class or lead a study or whatever it is, I spend time thinking about and praying about the people that I'm going to be talking to and what God wants to accomplish in them and the good that I want for them.
And not just in one area, but like in every part of their lives, may they be blessed by God's grace and peace. That's the blessing that the Christians would offer. and
the
priestly prayer
of number six, the Lord bless you and keep you and give you peace and give you grace. this
is what we want for people. And then more specifically, what are your hopes for them in regards to this study? And what are the specific goals of the next session?
And pray for those. And like Epaphras in Colossians 4 was struggling in prayer on behalf of the people in Colossae, well, we need to be wrestling, struggling, putting effort, pouring ourselves into praying for them. And when these goals of the study, the goals of the session become part of us, as God's will and God's message are written on my heart, then I can let go of all the other stuff and just attend to the person I'm trying to bring the gospel to and the word of God and leave my second tunic at home, settle into the house where I am and speak the word to
Bryan: prayer obviously is such an important part of it, which is why I knew you were going to kick this off with that conversation. But we talked a lot in our Getting to Square One sessions that we did about how we can come to these conversations with misguided objectives. So clearly prayer is gonna help us orient ourselves around the right motive, but taking time to reflect and clarify, like you were talking about there, what are you trying to accomplish in this conversation with somebody?
Are you trying to win an argument? Are you trying to win a soul to The
Lord? Like, are you trying to make this conversation about you? Or are you trying to make this a conversation about their relationship with Jesus? How can I get out of my own way? And I keep thinking about it in this way, and maybe this is helpful or not, but like, I keep thinking about a spiritual Sherpa.
Like, you know, how can I just
The Role of a Sherpa in Leading Studies
Bryan: be the kind of person who's already walked this path before, who knows how to get where we're needing to go? And how can I just lead somebody and guide them in a way that gets out of my own way and helps them to accomplish something, in their own mind and their own heart.
And obviously, like you said, prayer is a huge part of that. But just clarifying my mission is a real big one here, I think.
Ryan: Sherpa metaphor is really helpful throughout this whole thing, really. I mean, I could see us, I don't know if you brought that up on any of these other questions, the
Bryan: so. No, I don't.
Ryan: like knowing that somebody who knows the path, someone who knows the safest trail up the mountain knows where you're going, knows when to stop and camp for the night, you know, how to survive the cold as you know, I'm thinking about climbing Everest, , um, and, and that is really helpful.
And you know, as, as we think more specifically about Square One, if you're leading Square One, you are the Sherpa who knows where we're going and what the goal is and what we're trying to accomplish and, and what the, the prayer that we have in each session is.
Bryan: I think that's such a helpful thing because, you know, as we as we focus in on Square One, like how do you prepare to lead a Square One study? Well, aside from just looking at the content of that session. And I think it's also really helpful to take a listen to the checkpoint conversations that we recorded in our last season.
And they're also available on our website.
focusing in on certain aspects there, like the goals that we talked about or the prayers and the blessings we offered at the end.
these would help orient somebody to be able to lead this kind of study. And there's a lot of details, there's a lot of topics in this study, you know, 13 sessions, and we cover everything from the basics, like we did in those Checkpoint episodes, to, you know, what is the Bible all about? What is resurrection?
You know, how do we effectively break up with the past, which is, I love this session, I'm gonna really like getting into that one. You know, what is baptism all about. And then later on we talk about the church and how to be good influences in the world. And really at the end it's kind of almost like an invitation to roll right into cross-training, you know, roll right into discipleship development.
And so the flow of all these things might be helpful and maybe that's a good way to help somebody get prepared if they were going lead their own Square One study.
Ryan: you're going to be the Sherpa, if you're going to be the guide, you need to know the map. You got to know the map and you need to be familiar with it and you need to really have, at least in your mind, have gone through some of it and prepare and be ready
to know where you are at any given point and where we're going in the end.
Question #2: How Do You Invite?
Bryan: Yeah, and so thinking about how to prepare yourself is one thing, but then you meet somebody and you want to invite them to study these things with you, and how do we do that? How do you invite somebody to a study? Just generally speaking, I think some people jump right into just meeting somebody for the first time and then asking them if they want to sit down and talk about the gospel.
really feel comfortable doing that myself all the time, so I don't think you have to start by just jumping into the deep end of the gospel. Sometimes the best invitation comes after you've really shown up for somebody, focused on them, focused on listening and understanding them as fully as possible.
Go get coffee, start asking them questions if you don't already know them well, build up some trust, build up some empathy, get concerned about their life, and then roll all of that work and all of that connection that you've developed with somebody into
a conversation about deeper spiritual
Ryan: Yeah, in the getting to Square One series, we talked about how you can generate a lot of good conversations with questions and thoughtful statements and stories and just listening and trying to just be in real talk, you know, but like entering in from where they are hopefully, ideally, this isn't the first time you've broached the subject or that they have found out that you have any spiritual interest, you know, that you're a follower of Jesus, that this is something, you know, something about you that you might want to share.
But you know, it could be this is sometimes these things happen in a quick kind of a, you don't really have a lot of background with someone, but for most of us, we're going to be talking with and working with people that we know and that we are building some kind of relationship with. And so that can be an on-ramp to some of this.
And then there's that point where you say, "Hey, let's get deeper into it," as you said. At some point, I usually want to sit down, open Bibles together. You know, you don't do that at work, you know, across the cubicle or, you know, whenever you're just hanging out with somebody, you want to open Bibles. You want to sit down and really talk to help them to understand why you want to get together, I think it's important to be real, you know, let go of the need to push or convince them you are offering them a service.
You're offering them a blessing.
You want to
invest in them and it's an invitation for you to invest in them, an invitation for them to contemplate the most important guidance you've ever received. And so there's a personal aspect, you know, this is something that has affected me. This is something that has changed my life.
And
I would love to share that with you if you're interested. And then I would still suggest, even though it's an offer, even though it's something that you want to give to them, I would suggest you put it in the form of a question rather than just like, if you ever want to let me know, you know, it takes the pressure off, but it doesn't lead anywhere as often, you know, you, you really want them to say yes or no. And if they say no, that's okay. It doesn't mean that it's no forever, but you move on, shake the dust from your feet in some way, you know, you, you have, you can move on.
So yeah, I think that just sharing being real and then asking,you brought up karate kid and you think of those moments where you commit to something. I don't know why, when I think about asking for a Bible study, it goes back to like super scary times when I didn't really, you know, I was, I was nervous about it, but I associate any thing I'm nervous with, with like, this one time I, you may have done this with me.
Did you go skydiving with me
Bryan: didn't, but I remember when you did. laughs
Ryan: I'm not saying it's the same as jumping out of an airplane or like, you know, when you're at the top of a ski slope, that's like maybe a little more advanced than you're ready for it. It's just look straight down and you're trying to just be okay. Okay. At some point you got to just go, you know, you just push off
Bryan: you're
really selling it for people Ryan It's like skydiving you know laughs
Ryan: I'm just saying, whenever you're at the top of the mountain, you got to choose and just go, and it'll be OK. I survived. I made it to the bottom. And
you will, too. You'll get to the end of it, and they'll say yes, or they'll say no. This is the only things that are going to happen, and you'll
survive
Bryan: well, absolutely. But, you know, especially when you think about this series in Square One, I think one other on ramp you have in a study like this is, to really hone in when you're talking to somebody and listening to their struggles, listening to things that they're dealing with in their own relationships or anything else that's kind of hurting them.
Yeah. Is to to connect those struggles and difficulties with this first session. I'm so sorry that you've had to face these situations that you've been going through. It's terrible. And how would you feel if I shared a little bit about how I've handled some similar struggles in my own life?" And using that kind of conversation as an on-ramp, almost like pain as a segue into a conversation, jump out of the plane.
only going to give you two answers, right? But at the same time, using the conversations you've had and just trying as best you can to roll that right into this study would be really good if they're going through difficulty at any point in time.
Ryan: because this is the answer. Like, how can you help? "Well, you can be a sympathetic listening ear. That's good, that's important. And you can offer, you know, maybe there's some kind of a comfort you can offer by, serving them in some other way, but ultimately this is what they need. This is what they're looking for, is the gospel."
And so I like what you pointed to there also as how each of these studies is built around a question That's a real question that everybody, or at least most of us at some point, are asking as we progress down this road. Why
doesn't
the world make sense? Why is my life not working all the time the way I want it to?
Why are things so frustrating and sad in some areas of life all over? Many corners of the world, many corners of my life. And so, working
from that question gives you a way to say here's what we're going to be thinking about. And then ultimately, of course, the point is not to just camp on why things are bad, but that's where we want to start and understand the problem so we can understand the solution.
And
so, yeah, something like, " Hey, as I've thought about these questions, the answers have changed my life.
And if you have any interest, I would love to get a cup of coffee sometime and talk about it. You know, there is this discussion around some really important ideas that have affected me that I would love to just walk through with you and you know, you could give some background if you want, you know,
it's just some questions and send a few videos we might go through to think through it.
That can help them to know what they're getting into if they have some context of what it is you're talking about. But you don't want to just load them up. Give them the offer and why you are interested
Question #3: How Do You Schedule?
Bryan: Well, and so you start getting into the real nitty gritty specifics here and you then start thinking like how do you schedule a study like this? What do you do in terms of picking a time or a place? How long is this going to take? What do you typically do when you think about trying to schedule a study with somebody?
Obviously, you need a whiteboard nearby so you got to find a spot that's got a place to write.
Ryan: Yeah, well, that makes a big difference for me. Uh, you know, or or just bringing a big legal pad or something that I can I can doodle with them about. Um, you know, you want to be able to focus and you want to be able to this seems like the theme of this whole episode is focus. Yeah, you want to be able to focus and not worry about them feeling embarrassed if somebody hears them opening up or about a prayer or just having Bibles open.
You know, not everybody's used to that kind of thing. So I think public places do have benefits, but I tend to lean towards homes or the church building. It's just where I've started to end up more and more. It's a bit strategic again, so that you have sort of a cocoon of privacy for reflection and thinking through things. And this is a bit strategic. Maybe this isn't a situation everyone will find themselves in, but I mentioned, you know, you might be entering into a study occasionally with someone you don't really know, someone you just met or something like that.
And you think maybe they might get cold feet and you never hear from them again.
Advantages of Meeting at Their Place
Ryan: Well, if that's the case, I mean, again, that's something that I find myself in that situation, maybe more than a lot of, a lot of folks, but That's when their place really becomes an advantage because it gives them home court and it also doesn't require them to come to you.
Like, you know, they're, they don't have to do anything extra. You're not sitting there at the church building or at the coffee shop wondering, are they going to be here? I mean, I've been stood up so many times. It, I'm, I'm not, I'm not mad, bro. It doesn't make me upset. It's just like, okay, this is part of the territory with asking for these kinds of studies, but nobody stands you up when you come knocking on their door.
You know, if you're at their house, I mean, they might not be home, but you know where they live. I don't mean that to sound ominous, but I know where you live. And so I might come back and knock on the door again. Hey, I came by the other day and I didn't, nobody came to the door. And so that's an opportunity to consider also is, is just thinking about where is it going to make the most sense?
A lot of times sitting at their kitchen table or something like that can be a good situation.
Starting Conversations in Neutral Places
Bryan: Yeah, I like starting at coffee shops for obvious reasons.
Ryan: Because of the coffee. Yeah.
Bryan: Because of the coffee, right? But you know especially early on in a conversation like if you're just getting to know somebody if you haven't really gotten into like the deep down nitty-gritty Bible study yet going to a neutral place somewhere that you know is convenient for everyone to get to and You know timing can obviously be really hard with people's busy schedules But I think making sure that you stick to a respectable amount of time You know make sure that you commit to an hour and that you're not like over Monopolizing their time and you really try to stick to that make the meeting Just about that long if you can if you can possibly Control that but I like having a timeline I like making sure that we're going to a place.
That's sort of neutral and convenient for them You know and then obviously as you get into more of the the detailed personal kinds of conversations. I think you're right on the money that finding a more private space that you can focus is a real convenience. I'm sure somebody at one's church building would love to open it up so that you could go study there, but you know in the absence of that, people's homes and and other more private places, even outside if the weather's nice, like going to a park or something like that, generally you can find some more space away from other people there.
Scheduling and Structuring Your Study
Bryan: But when we get to Square One though and thinking specifically about how to schedule a Square One study, anything odd or different that may only apply to that or specifically apply to that kind of study?
Ryan: one thing that is in the design is there are two different paths that we've designed it with. There's the short one and the long one. And so you at least want to be thinking about, hey, what is the best situation for this particular study? This particular person, you know, 13 sessions is a super long time to ask somebody that you don't know very well to to engage in or that may or may not be all that interested.
and you really don't know. You know, if you're sitting down to study with, say, your 13-year-old daughter or with a friend that you've been in spiritual conversations with for a long time and you just want to dive into it or whatever, then that longer one is by far the more fruitful path. I mean, it really is what I would prefer for anybody.
But I think for a lot of people, the three sessions is going to be a more reasonable commitment. And so you just wanna let them know what we're in for, think about what makes sense. And you can always expand later, but get into it and prepare for whichever pathway you wanna
Bryan: like that it's flexible. We sort of tried to build it as like a choose your own adventure in some way. It's, you know, if you have just a little bit of time and the elevator pitch to somebody might be those three checkpoint conversations.
But either way, each session, we've designed it to really only take.
about 45 minutes to an hour. make sure you've shared that with them and let them know like, you know, we're not going to be sitting here for like two and a half hours every every time we meet. Make sure that you know, you've got a regular cadence that you're meeting on.
Because every session really tries to roll right into the next one. keeping the previous one in mind, if you can do it weekly or even biweekly, it's helpful to not have too long of a break in between.
Question #4: How Do You Start?
Bryan: So as you get somebody interested and they've agreed to meet with you, how do you get a conversation like this started?
before you really dive into heavy spiritual topics, like do not skip the getting to know them piece.
And everybody's situation is gonna be different. Everyone's context is gonna be slightly different from someone else. Like you may know somebody really well and you don't have a lot of onboarding to do, like getting to know them, maybe you don't know them very well at all. And it would be much more helpful to like go to a coffee shop and just sit and ask them questions.
And, don't make it like an interrogation, like shine a bright light in their face or, you know, make it all one-sided, like open up,
Ryan: the night of September 3rd, where were you? Yeah,
Bryan: Where were you? You know, echo back to them things that you're learning about them, share things that connect with their story about your own story, keep it light, keep it genuine.
There is no script here. There's no agenda, it's just real talk, it's relationship building. And I think that is huge in getting somebody feeling comfortable about opening up, just to know that like you're a real person and you actually do care about them. And you've also made mistakes in the past. Like, be vulnerable, be open and get to know people I think is a big way to start a conversation, whether you're doing Square One or not really.
Ryan: and the more we can make that a habit in life, the better, of course. But you really, you've already hopefully prepared yourself now to be genuinely interested and invested in them and you see them as important.
the reality is like the Word of God doesn't need your help, but people's listening affects their reception.
And so the more you follow the Bible's guidance on the kind of people the Bible says to be, the more effective you're going to be in doing the task the Bible says you have. I mean, like the Bible is the instruction manual on how we make a difference in the world. And so as we love people, as we connect to them and we show them what it means to be a Christian, then there is a kind of holiness that affects the way they receive the Word.
It's just a fact that the more we set the stage for the gospel with who we are, it can really make an impact on how it's received.
Bryan: you know, I definitely would not start session one about talking about how things are broken in the world without getting to know them, without getting a feel for what they know, know, what kinds of questions they might have?
Do they have a background in religion? Are they open-minded or are they closed off? Is this somebody who just needs the basics or do they really need like the full study, the full Square One study? And you know, that kind of will help you figure out to start, how to get started just really developing that rapport in the beginning so that you can have your eyes wide open, I guess, about what they may be going through and what they may need from you.
So being a really good listener, I think, is helpful just getting off the bat, especially when it comes to which direction to go, the long way or the short way.
Ryan: And I think going back to the Sherpa theme, you need to orient them to where they are, what's happening, what's going to happen next. Like they don't know, they're walking in blind. And so let them know, remind them why you asked and what the purpose is and thank them for being part of it. Let them know you value the chance to be with them.
And you know, you might let them know specific to Square One, these start a little light and then we'll slowly get into the meat, you know, and so they, they understand what we're about to get into and, and that it's, it might be a little silly at first, but this has a heavy end. I don't think it's gonna be light the whole time.
And you might also add, if you have questions, let me know and we'll make a note of them to make sure that even if we don't answer them right away, we can get back to them. You're just trying to give them a sense that this is about them, this is for them. There is a design to this, but it's all in service of walking with them through some really heavy but important topics.
Question #5: How Do You Guide the Conversation?
Bryan: and I think as we think generally about leading somebody in a conversation about the Bible, you know, if you don't have a plan, if you don't have a roadmap, or you know, like, if you're not, trying to get them to a destination, it can seem nebulous about what to do next. In any conversation you have with somebody though, how do you guide the flow of the conversation? Because you want to lead, but you don't want to grab the reins too hard, you know, you don't want to like pick the dude up on your back and Sherpa him up the mountain, like you want them to walk alongside you or behind you.
How do you do that?
Ryan: Yeah, you wanna poke them in the back with like a prod, you know, you're just driving them up that mountain. No remember when you learned to drive, I assume that everybody was told this, that when you come to a curve, you want to slow down before the curve and then accelerate out of them. Did you hear that whenever you were
Bryan: I think so, yeah.
It's good advice.
Ryan: and
here, as you're thinking about these different sections and the way that the purpose changes in any study, really, you want to slow down. okay to as you come into a transition, as you come into a new section, slow down, help them again, you're the Sherpa, help them think about the change that's going to happen, try to find, maybe even plan ahead to think through the transitions from piece to piece, especially if you're leading some study that you've put together and that isn't Square One, you know, Think about how you're going to go from piece to piece and make sure they all connect together and you have a way that they understand why we're here and how piece one led to piece two.
Bryan: Yeah. And I think no matter what material you're studying with somebody, you're going to have a general road map to be able to guide this conversation somewhere helpful, hopefully. And it is tempting to try and answer every question that comes along the way, because they are going to have questions and they're going to stumble over things and things are going to just hang them up.
And sometimes like you were just talking about a little bit ago, sometimes it's helpful to just say, look, I appreciate that question. great question. Let's write that down and we can get back to that as we get near the end of the study. We can circle back to those things. Everybody's got a plan until they get punched in the face is something that Mike Tyson said.
And just understand that no matter what your aim or your goal is, sometimes you need to be ready to handle the side tangents And you know, herd the cats and whatever else you want to call it. But like sometimes you need to be open to just being a little bit flexible you know, clearly acknowledging things that they're concerned about or questions that they have.
But doing it in a way that still keeps you on track is a skill for sure. If anyone has taught like a Bible class or anything like that in public, like, oh boy, it's a real, it's a real challenge herding cats for
Ryan: that's a really good tip. Just keep in track of those questions and you let them know that there's going to be answers to a lot of these questions throughout, like you said. It might feel like a punch in the face sometimes, some of the comments or questions you get. Hopefully not. Hopefully there's a different tone to it.
But man, you just never know. And so roll with it, like you said, be flexible, but try to stay somewhat focused. And you know, thinking about Square One specifically, these are all planned out and these five different sections in each one. Each one has a purpose and you want to know what the goal of each section is know, part one of Square One is intended to break the ice and build that rapport we talked about and part two is meant to orient you to the purpose and the main idea and part three to help you spend some time in the Bible together, opening the word, reading it together, letting God's word reach you with its full weight.
And then you get into part four, which takes the subject deeper. And then at the end of part five, you just want to bring it home. Some of them will try to get them to think about their own decision and make a decision. Others, it's just trying to get them to have some ideas that are going to stick with them and that they'll continue to contemplate.
And, you know, there is a challenge at the end of each one. And so there's something to think about and to work with and to do on each one. And so I would I would just say be ready and know the
Bryan: Yeah, yeah, I know what your waypoints are and I love, I love that in these parts of each session, there's a question to sort of cap it off so that it's a nice opportunity for you to talk
Question #6: How Do You Ask and Answer Questions?
Bryan: And so, how do you ask and answer questions in a study like this? pushing the conversation ahead in an unnatural way is really not the goal here. the worst thing you can do is ask somebody a question and then feel like you just have to speak to cut the silence, it is a challenge to give them space, to let them think, to let the moment breathe a little bit so that they can answer.
I think it's really helpful for us to just be patient. And if they really don't have anything to say, like really don't, like dig a little bit deeper and see if they're stuck on something, see if there's something you can clarify. But just jumping in and answering the question for them is not really helping them as much as you might think it would.
So
Ryan: yeah,
teacher friend reminded me not too long ago about what he called the 10 second rule that a lot of people need 10 seconds of silence before they answer. And as as a talker, sometimes I have in the past wanted to fill silences. And I also empathetically, I don't want to make people squirm too much unless that's really what's necessary in a particular moment.
But a lot of the awkwardness, you talked about awkward silences, a lot of the awkwardness usually comes from us. You know, usually comes from me whenever I'm, I feel awkward about the silence when really just getting comfortable with silences
just changes it and makes it not awkward anymore.
some things they may not want to answer and that's okay. You know, and you just move on. There'll be plenty of space. They're receive, everybody receives information in different ways. One of our members talks about how some people are microwaves and other people are crockpots that need to need to stew on something.
And so, yeah. [laughing]
Bryan: yeah, that's really good. And you know, with Square One here, it's focused on questions. So I think that the whole point of this discussion here, this little mini discussion, is to just get good at the thing that this study is all about, is asking
questions. If asking questions and answering questions are challenging for you, The Square One study may really not be up your alley.
If you're just interested in like, you know, filling out a box or writing things down and you don't really feel comfortable having, you know, these back and forth conversations with somebody about, you know, asking them a question and, you know, volleying off of them and, being present with them to see how the information is landing so you can adjust as needed.
Like, if that's not really your thing, that's perfectly fine. You know, Square One is really meant to be focused on the questions. And so hopefully if you're good at asking questions, this'll be a real, real straightforward type of study for you.
Ryan: Yeah, and the way that it's designed also includes your answers, as you say. So that really is going to help people to answer, I think. You know, like it's just, it's easier to, I like your word, volley off of someone. It's easier to think through what you have to say whenever you hear someone else tell their story.
Something about real conversation and someone sharing a story sparks something the time. It's just like how God made us that we are able to hear someone else's perspective and their experience and then you know we we relate to it and so then we want to share something about our experience and and now we're in it and so I would encourage those who are leading this study to think ahead about their answers to some of these questions.
Some of them are a little bit challenging to think through. So, you know, think about maybe I would go this way or that way with this. And at least you've pondered it a little bit because you are going to want to answer the question so that they will be able to have that opportunity. I would suggest that you not pass on any questions and don't say, " I don't know what I'd say in this one.
Let's go to the next thing." You know, so think ahead and be ready to answer whenever you get
Question #7: How Do You Conclude a Study?
Bryan: So, you know, this episode of our podcast is about to conclude and maybe this is the time where we talk about how to conclude a session of one of these discussions or, you know, any study really in general. How do you wrap up things at the end of a conversation?
Ryan: Two things that I would note here is appreciation and then acknowledging what has happened in the conversation. So, you know, appreciation at the end of a conversation, gratitude, acknowledging that that it's a big deal for someone to be willing to sit down for an hour and talk deeply about God's word, that's a special thing.
Bryan: Yeah, for
Ryan: And I think it can be valuable then to acknowledge the ground they took in this leg of the journey as you're trying to work towards the Lord. They should hopefully be standing at a new place now. Something hopefully has happened in this conversation. Maybe they learned something important. Maybe they hadn't opened their Bible in years and this is the first time now, "Hey, let's just acknowledge, here we are sitting down, you haven't opened your Bible since you were 10 years old, and here we are looking at the Word of God and hearing it together.
I just want to appreciate and acknowledge that." Maybe they acknowledge some need or confess something or said, "You know what? I
do have a long way to go." Or they made a decision or they asked you to pray for something. All of these are big steps in a spiritual journey toward the Lord. And so sometimes things can just pass by without you realizing and both of you, again, settling in to what has happened.
You're in a new place now. Let's acknowledge that and let's appreciate them for being part of it because it's a big deal.
Bryan: echo everything you just said obviously because you being grateful and showing them that you value their time and their commitment is huge But then also having like a clear direction in mind about what's coming next. Unless you're at the end of the study and they don't really want to meet with you anymore or whatever.
If they're intending to come back and you want to give them a picture about what's coming up next, I think that's helpful in trying to plant a seed to get them ready for the next time that you're together. Leave them with a question, ask them to read something before the next time, whatever it is that you can do for them and with them to help them see, a forward momentum to the next conversation.
I think that that can be super helpful in wrapping something up at the end of a particular session.
Ryan: Yeah,
and we close each of the sessions with, like I said, a blessing or a prayer. You might think about whether you would want to actually lead a prayer at the end of it and just consider that because it's pretty valuable. It might not be the thing that everybody's ready for that every conversation needs, but we didn't design that specifically in that as a prompt.
Now pray together about this, but I would really encourage you to think about praying and then afterwards to check in with them. Hey, how are you
feeling about that? How did that go? Any, any, you know, just, just, uh, hey, we went through something together. Now, where are you? I'm here and interested in how you're doing with this because this is all about you, you know
Bryan: Yeah, and with Square One specifically, like you were talking about ending with a prayer, we also end with a challenge at the end. And I think that's really important to not only ask them to do that challenge, but also to do it yourself and then check in the next time that you meet and make sure that you've said, "This is important, what we've talked about doing, what we committed to doing while we were away," follow up with it at the beginning of the next conversation so that it shows that these things were important and valuable.
Nothing is worse than like, "Hey, fill out all of these questions," and then coming back the next time and never actually addressing what they've done while they were gone. Show that it's important, show that reading this passage about Jesus' death on the cross this week while we were away, that was important, and I did it, and show up to the next conversation and talk about what you learned.
Or, you know, ask them, to share what they found insightful about that challenge or, you know, whatever it was that happened. Just don't get stuck at the follow-up, because, you know, sometimes you start talking about a particular topic off the cuff and that becomes the entire you know, so acknowledge it like you said and then move on to to the meat of the next conversation.
So yeah, hopefully this has been helpful.
Final Thoughts and Announcements
Bryan: I know there's a marathon discussion about like all the different tips and tricks and things and boy I mean there's so much more we could talk about like what Bible translation to use, do we use an app, do we use a paper Bible, like if you have recommendations or tips If you've got things that you've been thinking about, reach out to us. We'd love to take the things that you've been experiencing in your own studies and incorporate them into this conversation. We'd love to hear your feedback on the things that have worked for you and the things that haven't worked for you.
All right. So, that wraps up our little mini-series here with getting to Square One. hope that we did a better job this time these dots for anyone.
Rock the Vote!
Bryan: If you haven't voted in the Bible bracket, you should get your vote in today, because today is the last day you can cast your vote for your favorite Bible verse. On the next episode, we will be unveiling the winners of the favorite Bible verses and we're really excited for that. It is March, there is madness all over the place, and we thank you all so much for
tuning in. Rock the vote. All right, everyone, this has been episode 226 of the Bible Geeks podcast.
You can find us on our website at biblegeeks.fm, and you can find show notes for this episode, as always, in your podcast player of choice, or at biblegeeks.fm/226. Check us out on our blog for any more details on this episode or previous ones. Lot of helpful resources out there and we'd love it if you'd go check us out online.
and until next episode, may the Lord bless you and keep you.
Ryan: Shalom!